LiaWe make loads of decisions every day. Most of them unconsciously, which is good because our brains would be overwhelmed otherwise. But what can we do, if we want to decide about something intentionally, but somehow just don’t manage to do so in this very moment?
Most of us have been there: Shall I buy this or that thing? Take this or the other job offer? …
The good news: There are loads of different approaches to help us coming to a satisfying conclusion in short time. Let me show you some of my favourites:
Generally, if you don’t know if you should buy something like clothing or a handbag..just leave it. It means you don’t really need it and can live happily ever after without it;)
Imagine you were 70
That’s my personal absolute number one strategy. Imagine you were 70 years old and looked back on your life. Is this decision going to be vital? While it is obvious that deciding who you’re going to marry will be impacting your future life widely, buying this or that car or shirt will not. We often forget that fact, when we get lost in making a decision. We focus strongly on the current choice of objects, start thinking that the decision is longer ranged than it actually is and kind of loose focus. That stresses us out and under stress most of us can’t make smooth decisions. So what? Take a step back and have a look at the situation from further away.
Remember the saying about making an elephant out of a fly? Every time I feel that I’m making a big deal about a decision that actually just isn’t. I imagine I where 70 years old and looking back at my life. This puts the current situation in perspective, takes the pressure out and lets me make a calm choice.
Obviously you can also use this practice for big decisions. But for those ones I usually like to combine several methods. Hang on for the next tips.
Pregnant with
That strategy can be implemented by both, men and women 😉
Imagine you have chosen an option and you’re living with it for 9 month. How do you feel? Are you comfortable with your situation? Now live 9 month as if you’d decided on the second option. Only now you decide which option is best for you.
I sometimes apply this method imagining living with each decision for a few moments or a day. Often that’s enough to feel what the best solution is.
Toss a coin
Seriously, just toss a coin. If you’ve got two alternatives, put one on each side of the coin and toss it. No matter on which side the coin falls, you’ll immediately know which one will be the right choice. The reason is simple: this technique lets your unconscious desire show. You’ll feel at ease if the coin lands on the ”right” side or dissatisfied it lands on the “wrong” side.
Practice deciding
I’ve been there (and sometimes still am)..just not knowing what I want in simple daily tasks. That’s somewhat annoying. The good news: this can be sorted by exercising.
Assumed you’re sitting in a restaurant and just can’t make your mind up about which menu to pick. Go on and pick the 3rd menu on the list and order it. Every time you can’t decide after a few minutes what you want to eat, just choose the 3rd meal. This will train your brain and create a habit of making quicker choices. And also show, that the world doesn’t stop turning weather you’re eating penne or pizza today. Just imagine you were 70…would it make a difference? Nope.
Why do those practices work and one last tip
Well, usually we kind of already know the answer, we just have to find a way to become aware of it. Our brain and guts opt for a solution based on past experiences and the information on hand. If you can’t make a decision at this very moment, sometimes there’s also information lacking. Think about what more you need to know, to feel comfortable to decide.
As a last pointer: Sometimes there is no obviously right choice when it comes to complex decisions. At this point it can be helpful to give your brain a break. Because the more information or arguments for and against you gather, the fuller your head gets. Until at some point there’s just too much going on in that little head and it blows your mind. Take a break by focusing on something completely different. Find a riddle or read a funny children’s story. After that, let your intuition resolve the issue. Your intuition is much better in processing big amounts of data than you are by active thinking, trust in it.
